dear freshman year of college:

I don't even know how to start this because it is so hard to put into words how much the past few months have changed my life.

I knew since I was little that NYC was my place, but I never imagined it would be as good as this. You have this idea of what college is going to be like and how much fun you will have there and I had really high expectations for college and somehow you've surpassed all of them.

This past year has been what I would have written about in a journal years ago as my perfect life.

The past few months have not only taught me how to figure out how to do math problems that I will never need to know, but it's taught me what happiness is.

For those of you that don't know, my life has been hard. I am very open about it now because it has made me who I am. I have gone through hell and back to get to where I am and I think thats the reason that I appreciate so many things now. I appreciate all the relationships that I have gathered because in the past its been hard for me to trust people. Sophomore year of high school was complete hell for me. I was in a place that was so low that I really couldn't see myself being as happy as I am right now like ever. When senior year came around I thought I was finally finding my place when we were kicked out of our house by my father. Things seemed to always get worse and I could never see it getting better. But the thing I know now that I did not know then was that those things would make me the person that I have come to love. going to college came at the most perfect time, it showed me that the shitty things in life make you appreciate the good things in life.

The past year was everything that I needed and then some more. The people that I have met have shaped me in a way that is astounding. I have learned more than I ever have from you. You are all so supportive and just genuinely nice people it is refreshing to find people like that nowadays. I look up to so many of you, you're all just really dope people and I don't deserve to be friends with you. I have learned what true kindness is from you. I've met some of the strongest people in the world and it makes me so proud to be friends which such deserving people. thank you for letting me be a part of your life because trust me, you are such a big part of mine.

I have learned so much from you freshman year, like how I don't know how to shut up most of the time, and like how I will almost pay for matcha no matter how expensive. how I can't sit still for more than one second which is a blessing and a curse. yeah I do get in all those fitbit steps but I never give myself a second to breathe. I have learned that not only do I shuffle my left foot when I walk down the hallway, but that I also somehow still manage to walk into the wrong person's room. I have learned that laughing truly is the best medicine and that I can count on anyone that I have met to put me in a better mood. but most importantly I have learned to love this whole big family of friends.

thank you freshman year, you've been the best year of my whole entire life.

To my roommate: you have no idea how much I admire you. you are so talented in everything that you do. I am so beyond lucky that I get to call you my roommate. I treasure our late night deep talks about literally everything. I will forever be your biggest fan and support you with anything you do. I don't know that I am going to do without you over the summer like I am totally going to be talking to my wall. thank you for putting up with me and all my random quirks and my loud sneezes, that takes a lot of patience. I can't wait to see the future that NYC and the world holds for us, we are really going to take it by storm. I just want you to know that I wouldn't be the person I am today if it wasn't for you.

To my friends: from the beginning to the end man. I appreciate our friendships so much and I hope you know that I would burn bridges to get to you guys and would do anything for you. I can always go to you guys whenever I need a good cheering up. you make me excited to come to school here and you're one of the biggest reasons that I am always excited to be here. when I hear people talk about meeting their best friends in college I automatically think of you guys. I love you beyond words. you make me laugh until I cry and I can always count on you if I need someone to talk to. we are so similar in so many aspects of our life. I need you to know how talented you are and that I believe in you. I am so obsessed with you guys like literally I stalk you guys on instagram 88% of the time. you guys are all literally the coolest people I know and I admire you all so so much. I mean it when I say you guys are some of my favorite people in this whole entire world and I don't know what I did to deserve you. I couldn't ask for better friends. I can't wait to see where you all go in life and I will forever be on your sides through everything, I won't let anything happen to any of you. thank you for showing me what true friendship is (*cue the true friend by Hannah Montana*) I have truly never met so many people who are up at 3am with me and the hardest part about being home is going to be not having anyone to talk to in the middle of the night. you guys understand me and make me feel like I can be anything I want to be. I appreciate you so so much you have no idea, thank you for making freshman year everything it was.

To my family: you're the hardest part about being away. I wish I could pack you up and put you in my room (if only we had more car space lol) thank you for bringing me up to be the person I am, it's all due to you. I would not be the person I am if it wasn't for your constant support. thank you for putting up with me, I know I am a lot but you're always on my side. we've been through a lot together and I think thats what I admire the most about us. you two are my best friends in the whole world and I hope I am making you proud.

To the RA staff of MT: thank you for believing in me. I have met some of the most open people through you guys, you show me how important it is to show your appreciation and I hope you know that I appreciate you guys. you have made me feel so good about myself and believe in myself. I am so obsessed with every single one of you. you guys work so hard and are so good at what you do, you have made this year so amazing and respect you all more than you even know.

To the opportunities I didn't get: I'm not giving up on you. you've taught me to not give up and continue to strive to as much as I can. you've showed me that it's ok to fail at things, but to never give up. you've taught me to put myself out there even if it doesn't work out in the end. you've taught me that everything happens for a reason and that if it supposed to happen, it will.

To gained opportunities: thank you. you've given me the confidence to be who I want to be. you have shaped me into the person I am today. I have learned so much from you and have taken a little part of you with me from everything. every single opportunity, big or small, has made me who I am.

To me: wow. its crazy to see how far you have come dude. im so proud of you. looking back on life, im so glad you went though everything you had to to become who you are. you've gone through so much stuff but you've gotten through it all and that's why you can get through anything now. you deserve everything you get no matter what other people say. keep going. don't give up on the things you want. you can do anything you put your mind to. I can't wait to see where you go in a few years. keep doing you girl.

enjoy some of these fun pictures from freshman year, SEE YOU NEXT YEAR PACE!


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